Night out: Wedding party and my FRIENDS
My perspective: On this sheet, I have a confession to make! Yes, I had fear confronting all my friends
doing that. When with them, I used to take cocaine and drink a lot. But now, I am on my way to start
a new life with new me. So, here we are, a wedding party of my childhood friend. In my country
tradition is that we start celebrating earlier. We gathered at the groom’s house at 11 a.m. I knew that
here starts everything: the first glass of heavy alcohol than a cocaine line, and that goes endlessly.
- For me water! – I said
- Ok, I know that you were at this rehab centre, but take a line, your wife is not here, we
won’t say a word to her! – one of them said.
Well, it’s not her decision, its mine. But why should I say this to them? After being in this rehab
centre (and in my country the rehab centres are far from fancy, rather they are some shit places),
going through hell there, going through personal hell, all I hear is a support to take a line and not to
be afraid of my wife. None of them asked me what I do for money, since I am jobless, none of them
offered me help finding a decent job, none of them offered me support, but all I got was a support
to go back, to take a line.
I continued drinking water, they continued laughing. By 9 p.m. they completely neglected me. 20
years of friendship with these people was erased by my 11 hours not drinking with them nor taking
Then I saw how I looked like. Seven of them communicated with one another, switching pairs for
toilets shifts so they could take a line and come back to drinking. It was like endless going to the
toilet, coming back, starting talking about the next shift. They didn’t see the wedding nor they
celebrated it. They didn’t talk to me since they didn’t have what to talk about.
I was left alone, with my wife who according to them controls me! Well, she didn’t leave me for
being a drug abuser, and they left me for not being one. Then I realized that my friendship was all
about drugs and heavy drinking. They forgot all those fights we had for one another, they forgot how
we skipped classes, they forgot how we were chasing girls… all they know now is that I am not one
of them. At the end of this wedding I was crushed for losing them but happy for going out clean. I
lost winning over.
My wife perspective:
First wedding party with his old crew. All of them are drinking and all of them are taking drugs. Their
lives, their decisions, but I what was afraid of, was their influence over him. I know he decided to
change his life, he has my support and he is dedicated. He said so many NO to the things that were
his daily routines, and I didn’t want to see him fail.
But here we are. He can’t run away from the people he knows, nor he should. Confronting them is
one of the ways to become stronger and to find out who has his back. Sadly, enough, none!
What I saw there was disappointing. They neglected him for his choices. They refused to take him in
because he stood for himself. How childish is that? I saw so much pain in his eyes. And I am so sorry,
but I can’t replace his friends, I can’t replace all the memories he had with them, I can’t give him the
support they should give him as a friend. All I could do at that moment was taking his hand under
the table because I wanted him to know that he is not alone, that he is not making the wrong
decision. They don’t deserve him as a friend, because he is fighting and they are pushing him over
the cliff, selfishly enough not to see him winning.
To all of you. You are not alone… you are just around wrong people who make you alone although